One Month Anniversary

Today marks the end of my first month at the gym....

Category	Before	After
Weight	188.8	183.6
Fitness Level	Apocalyptic Death/ Below Poor	Above Improvable
Body Fat %	33%	30%
Mental State	Skeptical/Panicked	Determined/Committed

Can't believe it's 1 month already.  I'm happy that I've been able to stick with it.  A little bummed that I didn't' lose more weight.  But mentally determining to be committed to the long haul and to being patient and consistent. It's funny how much of a mental battle weight loss is.  My next goal is a fitness level of "good".

So.. 1 month down... 11 more to go....

Weekly Hike at Mt. St. Benedicts

Another conversation with Nigel....

I'm walking on the treadmill and this time Nigel hangs around.  I feel tense because every five minutes he adjusts my speed and my incline.  He looks at my tension and kinda chuckles.  He makes conversation.  " So how big yuh was before?"
"You mean how much I weighed?"
"Yeah"
"Well, at my highest I was 224lbs."
"Jesus Christ!" he exclaims.  I could hear the unwitting horror wrapped around his words. His exclamation makes me laugh. But I can't handle laughing as well as the speed and incline that he has me at.  I quickly grab onto the side bars as I feel myself sliding backwards. Nigel, who had been looking out the window, now looks at me with confusion and concern.  He positions himself quickly to prevent me from falling if that should happen.  He decides to clarify what's going on, "You're laughing, right?"
"Yes."
"At  what?  How I said "Jesus Christ"?"
"Yeah"
"I wasn't trying to be funny or sarcastic or anything.  It's just that was a lot of weight for your frame."
"I know.  Anyway, that was 2005.  I lost 10lbs by 2006 so I was 210.  By 2007, I had lost all of 1lb."
"Shit!" Again, another unwitting exclamation. He made it sound like it was such a disaster.  I started to laugh again.
"Ah not tryin' to be funny or anything yuh know." he explains again, "Continue, I'm listening."
"So, I gained another 2lbs, went on a diet/exercise thing and got to 206lbs. by the end of 2009 I was at 202lbs but I'm not sure if that was due to any efforts I made or the fact that I had diabetes."
"So after you were diagnosed with diabetes, what happened?"
"Well, I really changed my diet, and I got to 188lbs. I started fluctuating between 188 and 192lbs and then I decided to join the gym! And that's how I met you!!!"  I threw in the last part for a little humor.
Nigel really didn't seem to find it funny and he simply nods. "That was a lot of weight for your frame," he repeats.  Pause. "Could you walk up stairs?"
"Yes! I mean, a little slowly, but yes!"
"Slowly?  Your knees used to give you problems?"
"No, not really."
"Hmmm" He shakes his head as he still tries to wrap his mind around what I told him.
What I had accepted and taken for granted for years, he seemed genuinely shocked at.  I decide to ask, "Am I the least fit person you've had to work with?"
"No, no.." He reassures me, " I had a guy one time who was three hundred and something pounds."
Great. So I'm in the same category as the three hundred and something pound guy. "How long did it take him to lose the weight?"
"We worked through it.  He got to about 187."
"But how long did it take?"
"A while."
Like Nigel didn't want to say the time frame out loud.  I pushed him, "1 year? 2 years?"
"2 years."  We made eye contact.  He knew I was trying to figure out how that related to me. "Remember, I told you we would really need a year.  But give me till the end of the year-- six months--you'll see a big difference."
My mind started to race.  My "master plan" had been to join the gym for 3 months and work really hard.  Take a break for the school semester and then start back again on the next school break.  The plan didn't seem so masterful now. "Nigel, if I can make it through these 3 months, I'll join again for another 3months.  And then I'll join for another 3 months.  I'll take it in small steps."
"Doh worry, yuh go do it."  He answers his phone and leaves me with my thoughts.

Last words...

Nigel's last words as I walked towards the locker room after my workout-- "Tomorrow you'll feel a li'l sore, eh."  What he should have said: “Tomorrow you’ll feel like you’ve worked the land, toiled on the plantations and been trampled by the cattle, eh.”

Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness

Well who knew?  Seems like everything's got a name...  This would explain those two painful days last week...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_onset_muscle_soreness

http://sportsmedicine.about.com/cs/injuries/a/doms.htm

http://www.webmd.com/fitness-exercise/guide/sore-muscles-keep-exercising

No more pain!

I can see clearly now, the pain is gone... it's gonna be a bright, bright, sunshiny day!!  I think,there's a difference between pain and a "burn".  Last week, first two days of starting the gym, I was in pain.  It hurt.  But today, I can feel the "burn", kinda like a slight ache that reminds me that my muscles are there and I've used them recently.  It's like a light tap on the door, versus somebody banging and hollerin'  all at the same time.  That, coupled with my 2.2lbs loss last week, is my current incentive and motivation.  Now what would be whack is if I don't lose any pounds this week or if I gain.  That would be whack.

Comparisons

Can you see the difference??  I keep comparing pictures of me over the years and asking aloud, "Do I look different?"  Davley keeps telling me that I look so much different.  I look in the mirror and I can barely see it.  I know my clothes fit differently and the scale shows a change, but looking in the mirror I still see plus sized.  I decided to use the My Virtual Model site to recreate my different weights, starting with my highest ever.  I can kinda see a decline...
Update:  Someone dear to me just informed me that at no point have I looked like the models. =P

It will always be with you?

"So, I thought I'd just let you know that I'm in pain." I said to Nigel as I walked over to the weights.
"Yeah?"
'Yeah.  It hurts to sit.  It hurts to stand.  It hurts to walk.  I hurt."
"Well, doh worry.  We goin' easy today.  We workin' de core an' then you'll do the treadmill."
I didn't feel like I was getting enough sympathy and understanding. "So, when exactly does the pain go away?"  I could hear a guy snickering from behind.  I glanced back and he was doing some sort of squat with some weights.
"Well...after awhile, but if you keep doing more [challenging yourself] it's always there."
"What?!?  Are you in pain?"  I asked precociously.
"Girl, right now ah could feel de burn in my chest, my arms... you learn to live with it."
Hmmm... now that wasn't the answer I was expecting.  All these ripped, buff guys walking around as if it were just natural to look like a demigod were in pain??  I had to think about that one.
Anybody else in pain??

Pain

Feels like I'm living on Pain Avenue.  My quadriceps hurt.  My abdominal muscles hurt.  My biceps and triceps hurt.  My ham strings hurt. My deltoids hurt.  Movement hurts.  Nigel started me off on the treadmill yesterday.  Started at a 6.0 gradient at a 2.5 speed.  I think I looked away and  then back and noticed he had upped my speed to 2.9.  He starts chatting with me about his iPhone.  Chatting away and I'm doing ok.  He's like, "How yuh legs feelin'?"  I'm like, "Good!"  He responds "Good!" and ups the speed to 3.0  Huh?  What?  I told you I was good.  He keeps talking about his iPhone. I'm starting to sweat.   He gets a call, "Ah comin' back eh."  So I'm like, "So just keep doing this?  Walking?" "Yeah, look at the screen. Yuh have a 30 minute walk and yuh only have 10 more minutes."  "Oh. Ok. Good".  " And since you're good...."  He reaches over and ups the gradient to 7.5 and walks away.  "What the...?"   Ok, so now I'm pumping my legs and breathing real heavy.  The sweat starts to drip.  5 minutes later he comes back.  He stands to the side... watching me, drenched in sweat, huffin' and puffin'... I'm just waiting for him to ask me how I'm doing... just waiting.... but he doesn't.  He looks at my face, "Oh oh!  Ah workin' yuh hard?  Nigel makin' yuh work, huh?"  I thought I heard sympathy in his voice.  I relax slightly and I huff out, "Yeah..."  "Yeah," he agrees and ups the gradient to 8.0 and the speed to 3.2. "Yuh almost done."    I grab on to the bars and walk an incline I've never encountered before on a treadmill. "Yuh eh dyin'" Nigel informs me from the side, "Yuh doin' good." and starts to chat about his recent trip to DC.  If I wasn't breathing hard like a water buffalo, I would've told him to shut up.